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Sunday, November 30, 2014

Blog Fail November 2014

I have yet again not worked to maintain my blog. Sure, there are some articles sitting in folders waiting to be published, but I have not taken the time to upload them. There are two articles right now ready to be added to the Lurker Series along with a few others I should probably look over as some time has passed since writing them. I truthfully do not know what I will be sharing or not in the future. It looks like the Lurker Series may never be added to in the future due to drama of my own creation.

This blog has a problem. That problem is me. Well, two problems. The first being her author, and the second being a lack of identity. I have changed the focus of the blog a few times since its inception. I even went without any real focus for a while just bashing away at the keyboard. This works as long as I feel I have something I want to say, but I rarely do. Most of what I have to say on practically every subject imaginable has been stated more eloquently by others or touched on by someone closer to the various subjects than myself. This is why I do not feel the blog can really work for sharing my opinions. For me to do so on the blog on a regular basis would be me moving a discussion occurring in my head to a screen where I could read it for myself and has little potential to offer anything beyond seeing my exact phrasing in front of me.

Recently I have been running an Icons game set in Paragon City in roll20 for friends. I would be lying if I said running this game does not scare me. I find I want to cancel each game before anybody has a chance to show up and spend a little bit of time doubled over on the toilet the day of the game. That is part of the reason I do it however. I have to push through some of my issues, and I have fun once we are actually playing. Sure, the dread sets in once everyone logs off again, but I have fun while the game is in session. We are set to finish up the first series in a couple of weeks and will take a break until some time in 2015. We have yet to really discuss when or if we will pick the game back up.

I was also in a Warhammer 40,000 escalation league this fall, but finances changed and I realized I would not be able to play to the end like I originally thought so I pulled out. I have not been to the gaming store since then. I am not happy about my decision because there are some really great people to hang out with in the league, but I feel I made the right choice as it means no one is out of a game because they were scheduled to play against me.

I have been painting. It has been slow, but things are still getting painted. There are finished models I could share, but the camera is still a bit wonky. Sometimes I can get it to power on, and sometimes I can not. Even when it does the pictures are quite grainy no matter how I try to adjust the settings. I am still sort of looking at getting a replacement camera, but it is not a priority for me so is something that has continuously been put off since the camera started having issues.

Other than that my life is quiet. I spend a lot of time sitting around, drinking coffee, and half writing game systems or tweaking existing rules for games. There really is not much to blog about unless I attempt to artificially create topics or share my opinion on things where I feel my opinion matters less than those of many other people or I feel I have something different to express. I do not care overly much for creating topics just to have content. I fear I might fall into a trap of attempting to be witty. There are few things as unbearable as an idiot attempting to be witty.

So, that is the state of the blog. I do not know if this blog will see any use in the near future or not. I know I will post here in the future. It is still my personal blog. I still plan to use it when I want. I simply have little need to write much of anything here right now is all.

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